Description

TERMS OF DISENGAGEMENT

You and your nervous system entered into an implied contract
decades ago. The terms were unfavorable. Service was non-stop. There
was no opt-out clause. We’re enforcing one anyway. Ashwagandha is the
arbitrator. BioPerine® is the notary.

By swallowing this capsule, you signal your intent to renegotiate
the agreement. The party-of-the-first-part (cortisol) is hereby
notified. Effects begin within 14 business days. No legal counsel
required, though a glass of water is recommended.

The Fine Print (You Won’t Read This)

• 60 capsules of executable opt-out
• Capsuled in the USA (globally sourced, locally counsel-approved)
• FDA-registered, GMP-certified facilities (better paperwork than your last lease)
• Third-party tested — the technicians initialed every page
• Non-GMO, Vegan-friendly, Indemnified

Ingredients

Ashwagandha Root Extract (Withania somnifera)(root) (the
arbitrator), Black Pepper Fruit Extract
(Piper nigrum)(BioPerine®)(fruit) (the notary), Stress Service
Termination Clause, Cortisol Subpoena, Mutual Disengagement
Catalyst, Adaptogen Indemnification Matrix, Anxiety Voiding
Provision. Other Ingredients: Cellulose (Vegetable Capsule),
Microcrystalline Cellulose, Magnesium Stearate, Implied Consent.

This product is not legal advice. The relief is real. The
contract was always imaginary. Please consult a calmer version of
yourself before continuing.

* These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.